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Educashun…it not Working!

Ambling along in traffic last week, a large bus-stop poster caught my attention.  In big, bold print it announced: 

 

Educashun

isn’t

working

 

Sadly the apparent quip was lost on me as my first thought was, “who is Edukah-shun?”… A thousand apologies to the poor sod who came up with the supposedly meaningful header.

 

I Can Has Educashun?

(This obviously is NOT the bus-stop poster – just in case you were wondering…)

 

‘Education,‘ it said, ‘is not working.’  But with the increasing numbers of able-bodied adults sitting at home, watching daytime television all day and getting free cash for it; surely our problem is that parents, (no pun intended) are the ones who aren’t working?  At the risk of sounding a bit anally retentive, what do most of the children who cannot spell, cannot read and cannot string more than three words together (at 14), usually have in common?  A bad school?  Perhaps.  But in that bad school, there will be plenty of bright, well-spoken, fully receptive children amongst those aforementioned.  So clearly the ‘bad children’ are making the ‘bad schools’ – not the other way around.

The media takes great pleasure in demonising failing schools and under-performing institutes; seemingly easy targets when society begins to fail.  But this appalling practice is grooming us into a nation of blame-deflecting morons, who believe that people other than themselves are somehow responsible for the upbringing of their offspring.

In many other countries, the basic principles of what it is to be a courteous human being are taught in schools; children should be gracious, make requests appropriately and have respect for others.  However it would appear that the children of Britain have not had these fundamentals enforced at their place of learning; the likely reason being because all time is consumed by the grim task of actually getting them to learn anything.  Despite this, it should be a coordinated effort between parents and teachers; the responsibility of nurturing an upstanding citizen rests largely with parents and family.  If a child frequently swears, rebels and retorts at home with the people he/she sees the most and should respect the most, what chance does a mere teacher have?

During some casual observation at work, I noticed a young boy who persistently tried to launch himself across the shop floor on a shopping trolley.  His mother squawked at him to stop over and over again, shrieking and yelling until everyone in a 4-mile radius noticed them.  This tragic display of bad parenting continued until she completely lost it and started to fire random expletives in every direction.  As if it were not embarrassing enough to watch, her ‘f*cking little sh*t’ (her words, not mine) found it hilarious and continued to hurtle around like an energiser bunny on crack, whilst my hope for humankind died a little.  Later on as they made their exit, I observed that both mother and son had regained some composure; she was laughing and joking with him again, so I assumed that she must have had a firm talk with him.  And as a spark of hope for humanity reignited in my heart, she leapt gracelessly onto the trolley and bombed across the car park with her son squealing in delight behind her.

My ensuing point then, is that school is not some mystical place where the demented spawn-from-hell will go for a few years and miraculously come back as angels; more likely they will go there, gather a troupe of other hellspawnish children and make the school close down with their dreadful grades and disgraceful behaviour.  Or appear on Fail-Blog :).  Children learn by example, and some parents clearly need to be setting better ones; if the saying ‘monkey see, monkey do’ is anything to go by, then some people need to stop acting like monkeys.

By no means am I saying that all parents are guilty of the same crime, but there are far too many people eager to point their fingers before taking a look at themselves.  Is it really the education system that is raising a generation of poorly spoken, illiterate, ill-mannered brats?  Maybe instead of rolling up a fag whilst waiting for dole money every week, they could try reading with little Brittany-Leigh or Payton-Jay, or perhaps encourage them to stop speaking as if they were afflicted with severe, mental retardation.  Otherwise before we know it, kids will be addressing their teachers as ‘blud’ and telling them to ‘allow it!’

…Oh wait, they already do…

Educashun isn’t working?  Well then parentz better knuckle down.

 

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  1. January 17, 2010 at 1:12 am

    Brilliant, absolutely brilliant post! I especially enjoyed the fail blog part. I LOVE YOUR BLOG!

  2. Paddy
    January 18, 2010 at 10:56 am

    Fu!$in wicked darlin!!! hit the nail on the head i think! especially the hellspawnish children! very very very cool!

  3. January 21, 2010 at 9:10 am

    Children…..*shudder*

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